Stress

For the last 4 months my 18 yro nephew has been living w/ us. I am having the hardest time trying to get him to help do anything around here and his favorite line is that he's "free, white and 18" when it comes to running.

He even went as far as to tell my husband that he shouldn't have to do anything around the house because he works. That floors me that he would say that since he's living in some one else's house.

It's just basic stuff around the house. Leaving dirty clothes everywhere, not picking up dish's.. We fight like no other because he thinks he should be able to eat dinner in the living room instead of at the kitchen table. The last time I got after him, he had the nerve to tell me that he was 18. I just keep reminding him that it is my house.

My biggest problems is that his parents do have a house here, it's out of town. Up until a few months ago, my brother in laws mother lived on the property and took care of the place but she moved to KS. At one time, my sister asked D to move over there, said they would pay the utilities for him. He didn't want to because of gas prices but most of all, all the bill collectors and people after my sister and brother in law, he don't want to get in the middle. His granny told him the sheriff was even over there looking for them at one point.

D's GF lives down the road from his house and seeing that he's got NO friends and his every moved and revolves around her, he still won't move out there.

I put a curfew on him during the week of 10:00 because if he's out late, he won't get out of bed and go to work. Weekends it's 1. Everything was fine until summer came and his GF is now out of school and her curfew's aren't the same. Before, she had to be home at those times and he didn't care.

Well, last week he wanted to go out w/ her. I told him he had to be home at 10. We argued a little and by the end, stupid me gave in and said fine, he could stay out till 11. Well, guess what? He didn't get home till 11:30 and then got up claiming to be sooo sick he couldn't go to work.

Then a few nights later, the GF calls and wants to go ride bumper cars in Idaho Falls (about 20 min away, there's NOTHING to do here) and I said ok but you better be home by 10 and no excuses. His GF was on the phone and she heard me yelling at him. Well once again, in my face. He calls about 10-15 min after and 10 and says he's about 10 min outside of town. I totally blew up on him and told him I was tired of how irresponsible he's being. I told him I'd just see him when he got home and hung up. Slap in the face #2 of the night. Dumbass figured he was already in trouble, why not live it up. He never came home till 11:30. Hubby and I were laying in bed waiting but I wasn't going to say anything to him that night because Eric had to be to work early and we were already keeping him up. So then we are about asleep and my 9 yro comes in yelling.. Get this, slap #3. He thought he'd let me cool. He took off and went out to his house to stay the night. He didn't have the nerve to tell me, he just left.

Well now I'm highly pissed. I told him I wanted him out. He could go out to stay at his house. Ya know, I was on my own at 17. I know how hard it is and I didn't have ANYONE to fall on and I even had a child. Where theres a will, theres a way. So anyways, he calls his mom and tells here what a bitch I am and blah, blah, blah.. She then tells him to call the utilities and have them put in his name. The gas has been shut off because of none payment and the electric, well, she told D that was supposed to be shut off a long time ago.

Now the guilt trip on me. I know my nephew can't afford to go out there and pay the utilities. As is, he's loosing his job the end of Aug. first of Sept. Not his fault either, the business is being sold.

Not only that, he was going to find an apartment w/ a cousin of mine but.. he ruined that one. He was staying the night at there house and my aunt ran into into D;s truck. My aunt was trying to tell D since he was family, he needed to wait and let her pay out of pocket instead of insurance. I kept telling him to go to my uncle because my aunts an alcoholic. The last time he went over there, she pulled him aside and started crying about how behind she was on bills and how every things put on here because of my uncle's Parkinson's disease. He called his dad and asked him what to do and my brother in law told him to tell them if they didn't pay it, he'd sue them. That it wasn't family any more, it's business and that they had till 4 the next afternoon to fix it.

D goes over there after the work the next day. He parked across the street and after talking to them, he walked next door to talk to someone. After a few minutes he gets in his truck and ready to leave and my aunt calls him over. Proceeds to tell D that his uncle had hit his truck. D came home freaking out like no other.

In the end, he did get his truck fixed but he had threatened my uncle in some other ways that he's now not allowed over there. Whatever he said, he freaked my uncle out to where he put a baseball bat in the house because he was afraid of either D or his dad.

My uncle blamed it on my brother in law. I mean D reactions. I know D, well all of my nephews and nieces are messed up because of my sister and her hubby. 3 years ago, they got to see my brother in law pull a gun on a relative. But I feel that that excuse is getting old. He's been living w/ us for 4 months now. I know that some things won't change but D should understand that he's in someone else's house.

Mentally, I don't know how much I can handle. I have so many other things going on w/ my own kids, my life.. lmao.. I just had a credit check ran on me and it said possible fraud because my SS card wasn't issued until 79 and I was born in 76 and that also since it was issued in WI and I was born in Id. I mean I have enough stress and it's like he's oblivious to my life, my kids, or anything else.

His mom and dad said he only wanted to come back here for his GF. Not to get away from the asphalt business or to be a man and they were 100% right. He was trying to get his GED and now I can't get him to do any of it. pisses me off because I paid for the tests. Whats sad, his GF works 2 jobs, WalMart and Burger King. He works from 7-3:30 and complains about having to get up early and wants a job where he don't have to get ups so early. He goes to work and comes home and just sits and waits for his GF to call or come over. I could write another zillion pages about her but I won't right now. W/ her, it's an easy fix. All I have to do is call her parents and tell them D and GF's little secrets. Since they are so religious, he wouldn't see her for awhile.